THE BALLAD OF THE 12oz. GLASS

(To be sung to the tune of "Do You Hear What I Hear?")

Said the customer to the counter girl,
"Would you serve me ice tea,
in a 12-ounce glass, counter girl?
Would you serve me ice tea?
In a glass, a sparkling 12-ounce glass?
My mouth is as parched as can be.
My mouth is as parched as can be."

Said the counter girl to the D.M.O.,
"Wash a glass for ice tea.
Wash a 12-ounce glass, if you please.
Wash a glass for ice tea.
He’s getting mad, he’s really getting tea’d.
Won’t you wash me a glass ‘fore he leaves?
Won’t you wash me a glass ‘fore he leaves?"

Said the D.M.O. to the counter girl,
"George dropped our glass for ice tea.
We have no 12-ounce glass for iced tea.
George dropped our glass for iced tea.
He went for more but dropped them on the floor.
We won’t have more for a week.
We won’t have more for a week."

Said the counter girl to the customer,
"Are you still alive, sir,
clutching at your throat, customer?
Are you still alive, sir?
You’re very pale, your eyes are sunken in.
I will get you the nurse if she’s in.
But the chances will be one in ten."

Said the counter girl to the customer,
"Does this mean no tip, sir,
on my counter bare, customer?
Does this mean no tip, sir?
You’re overcharged, I’m grossly underpaid.
I think we’ve both been had by Y.P.
So it’s not all my fault you can see."

Said Bob Wright to the flustered counter girl,
"You did your job quite well, girl,
Saving our iced tea, counter girl.
Our food costs almost nil, girl.
But George must go, our stock is getting low.
His Thursday check will instead be a bill.
He performs for us best standing still."

By Jim Baker, with a little help from Gail Sime & Brian Boroughs
Songwriters Extraordinaire, 1971

Hark the Herald Angels Shout

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